Exploring the poem "Impatience" from the book "Plunging into the Darkness" by Tara Vatanpour

Exploring the poem

         First of all let's talk a little bit about the ebook and book "Plunging into the Darkness", by Tara Vatanpour. Why this title and why this book ? 

         The book was written as a way to take away the pain that the author was feeling. Each word and poem felt like a way heal a little, heal from all these life moments that seemed to only carve more trauma into her life. Poetry in "Plunging into the Darkness", is used as exorcism for the writer, a catharsis for the reader. Talking about trauma, about sadness, depression, suicide, eating disorders, sometimes hope. Some memories are very distinct and referring to a personal narrative. 

        In any case, the title "Plunging into the Darkness" seem to reflect appropriately the willingness to go head first into the pit of difficult feelings to deal with. It has been written with the hope that it will help the reader heal as well, by hearing the words, resonating with their meaning and beauty, their sound, like a song. 

So, Let's talk about the first poem on the list ! Here is an extract :  


Wanted you more and more and more

Wanted no more but more and furthermore

Wanted to feel, to scratch, to scream

The scene was a absurd line

Looking at an « I » than wasn’t mine

I just couldn’t do me, or you,

There’s just the earth I hear in

Or you and you and you, yellin’

It’s like a hot river running

It’s running nowhere but it’s a drowner

With the sounds of water all over

A dumb deaf tough drummer"

-> This poem is the first of a series in this ebook and book, available here : https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08F6TVZH6 and on other Amazon marketplaces. This poem reflect the intensity of life all accumulated to one moment of feeling overwhelmed, when the memories and the pain rings too hard, so hard that the only flow inside of us is one of darkness. 

In this poem, Tara Vatanpour talks also about a dissociation, a look upon who she was, what was, and what Is happening now, a process of transformation that is negative, hard to live with, hard to recognize. There is a powerlessness expressed regarding life, and relationships. The title "Impatience", recognizes an attitude and the poem in itself seems almost to be the expression of it.